Henry Liu

Beer Hack: When you absolutely must get drunk

1. Stick the bendable straw into the beer bottle.

2. Drink from the bottle while leaving the straw tip poking out of your mouth.

3. ???

4. Profit.

When you chug a beer, what you’re relying on is gravity. As you chug, a pressure differential works against you, and the rate of debauchery slows way down unless you periodically release your lips from the bottle. The straw opening ensures that gravity can do its thing: make the girls around you look like Kiera Knightly instead of Amy Winehouse. Amen.